Archive for June, 2014
Were Major Media Outlets Including Huffington Post Fooled By Halford/Lady Gaga Prank?
Posted by Keith Spillett in General Weirdness, Uncategorized on June 30, 2014
An Alleged Photograph Of Rob Halford From The Interview With The Huffington Post
A Tyranny of Tradition prank might have claimed yet another series of new victims. Back on April 28th 2014, this website ran an article claiming that the new Judas Priest album, scheduled to come later this year, was a hoax. The album, of course, came out in July. Tyranny simply meant to write satire to confuse and amuse the metal loving masses.
However, this time, things might have gotten out of control.
In a recent interview with The Huffington Post Canada, Rob Halford discussed a possible duet with pop star Lady Gaga. While Halford’s love of Lady Gaga has been known for over four years, there is an eerie similarity between the Tyranny article and the Huffington Post interview conducted days earlier.
In the final paragraph of the Huffington Post article, Halford is quoted as saying, “I’ve been a huge fan of Gaga since she first burst on the scene. I just love everything that lady represents. First and foremost, her voice is extraordinary. I love her voice. She’s an accomplished musician, she plays piano really well, she’s just a great songwriter. And she’s a beacon of hope for a lot of people in the world.”
In the final paragraph of the Tyranny of Tradition article back in April, Halford is falsely quoted as saying “I’ve been her since she first burst on the scene. I just love everything that lady stands for. First and foremost, her voice is extraordinary. She’s an accomplished musician. She plays piano, oboe, zither and tambourine really well. She’s just a great songwriter. And she’s a beacon of hope for a lot of people in the world.”
The interview with Halford has been picked up by many major media sites including The CNN of Heavy Metal Blabbermouth.com. Tyranny of Tradition writer Keith Spillett has not been able to be reached for comment.
The Men From Outer Space
Posted by Keith Spillett in Existential Rambings on June 24, 2014
“King Christ,this world is all aleak;
and lifepreservers there are none:” -ee cummings
There is no Overman…only an Outerman.
We are The Outerman. They are The Innerman. Made from the same material. Subject to the same illusion. The two share nothing in common beyond circumstance.
The Outerman does not stand above the world of The Innerman, rather we are mired in it. We watch its absurdities not from a distance, but from a terrible proximity.
We bare the scars of The Innerman’s creations. We live in the demented cesspool of their need for acceptance. Adoration that will never come from the other Innermen. They are blind. Each alone in the company of Others. Each pantomiming human form. Each actors on a stage that stretches from dawn till death.
Both The Innerman and The Outerman are prisoners of the same sickening carnival, the only difference between the two is The Outerman recognizes it to be what it is. No superstition can save him. No machine can revive him. He walks to his fate with the dignity and honor of a man who will not accept the debasement of delusion.
The Outerman looks in the mirror and sees a product of alienation. An alien in a world of aliens. A jigsaw piece that does not fit. Awake among dreamers. There is no Hollywood ending for him or anyone else. There is only decay.
The Innerman looks in the mirror and hopes somehow to mold his face to the reflect the blank stare of the other Innermen. He can never get it right no matter how hard he tries. Never fast enough, never strong enough, never smart enough. Everyday he hopes he’ll see a different image in front of him. If he could just find the formula. The Man With The Answer. But there is no Man and there is No Answer.
The Innerman’s world is one of violence. Violence not in the sense of harm towards others (although some choose that path), but a violent ignorance that turns a blind eye to the suffering in their midst. The Cause portion of the equation forgotten. The Effect always a mystery.
“Why do they hate us?” they wonder aloud, never seeing the answer apparent to anyone not forever trapped in fantasy. Violence is the righteousness of the provincial and the tyranny of the obvious. The world of the Innerman is a dream inside of a dream inside of a dream, with a waking nightmare always somewhere in the corner of his eye.
The Innerman is doomed. Even God won’t save him. Why would He bother? He is too busy poisoning children with cancer, creating horrors like ebola and teaching his followers to hate that which makes them human.
He is the God of letting good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people. He is not The God of Love, He is The God of Pestilence. The best thing God could be is a fantasy. For if he is not, He is a sadist.
Both The Outerman and The Innerman are bound together. They walk to the same gallows, suffocated by the same rope. The Outerman calls it a hanging. The Innerman calls it salvation.
Rage Against The Machine and Sony Records Declare War on Capitalism
Posted by Keith Spillett in HEAVY METAL MUST BE DESTROYED on June 18, 2014
Reunited rockers Rage Against The Machine have taken another bold stand against capitalism by re-signing with revolutionary record label Sony. The multinational corporate giant has made no secret of their hatred of consumer capitalism and plan to help Rage Against The Machine lead a worker revolt that will bring the current world order to its knees.
Guitarist Tom Morello announced their act of rebellion only moments after introducing the strongly anti-capitalist rock band Kiss during their induction to the Rock’N’Roll Hall of Fame. Kiss, who has refused to sell their lunchboxes, toys, and tee shirts to anyone who openly opposes the Zapatista revolution in Mexico, plan to release an anti-capitalismcore album called “Rockers of the World Unite” through Sony in the fall.
According to Sony spokesperson George Rockwell, “It is obvious that capitalism has failed. We plan on supporting America’s transition to communism by selling Che Guevara hoodies, Mao Tse-Tung denim jackets and Fidel Castro bobblehead dolls. Let’s face it, the only way to destroy capitalism is by using capitalism to sell products meant to destroy capitalism.”
Morello’s contributions to the revolution have included contributing to the soundtracks of Talladega Nights: The Ricky Bobby Story and The A-Team movie. He and bandmate Zach de La Rocha’s music were also a part of the Trotskyite videogame Guitar Hero. Rage Against The Machine’s vitriolic stand against capitalism in all of its insidious forms has even managed to infect the iPod of former Republican Vice Presidential Nominee Paul Ryan, helping him through many difficult workouts.
Sony’s President Ron Boehner has made no secret of their support for “legends of anti-capitalism like Norm Chomsky and Erma Goldman”. Sony’s corporate vision includes turning all of their factories over to the workers by the year 3071 and helping to open more coal plants to slow the effects of global warming.
Tom Morello’s side project, Rage Against The Washing Machine Sponsored By The Whirlpool Corporation, are known for their rock covers of Pete Seeger and Paul Robeson songs. They are currently touring malls throughout the Midwest.
Manowar: The Undisputed Kings of Comedy
Posted by Keith Spillett in Excessive Cruelty Towards Strangers on June 13, 2014
In The Hallowed Halls of True Satire, no comic acts have attained the lofty heights that Manowar has reached by accident. Charlie Chaplin, Abbott and Costello, The Three Stooges, Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, George W. Bush….no one is on par with Manowar. It’s not even close.
An odd mixture of Goebellsian fascist imagery, arrested pre-teen angst and Rodgers and Hammerstein, Manowar have created an act that aims to stretch the boundaries of the absurd far beyond their breaking point.
The sheer earnestness with which they fight for a cause that is not really being threatened is breathtaking. They are defenders of a faith that no one has. Protectors of a mythos so silly that it is hard to imagine that they can stand on stage for an hour and a half without breaking into fits of laughter. Yet they soldier on, without a hint of the joke that only they do not get.
If you’ve been to a Manowar show, you know what I’m talking about. What can be said of a band whose claim to fame is playing at a volume so beyond the limits of what the human eardrum can handle that one would think they were part of a secret government conspiracy to infect all metal fans with tinnitus?
When I saw them, every one of the 300 or so fans around me had their fist clasped within their hand waiving it in a salute called “The Sign of The Hammer”. Mussolini couldn’t keep a straight face. Yet somehow, Manowar does.
Joey DeMaio, the band’s bass player and spiritual center, actually came out when I saw them and read this rambling, demented love letter from a fan about the life-changing power of Manowar’s music. Even the most devout, snake-passing evangelical would chuckle at this trick. Yet somehow, Manowar does not.
The case for Manowar as the greatest comedy act is easy to make. Anyone who has listened to them can easily tick off some of the highlights. Who can forget the “letter they wrote to ‘The MTV’ and the Radio (singular)” where they say “What’s going on? Don’t you care about me?” Or the thrity one second note Eric Adams warbles through at the end of “Black Wind, Fire and Steel”?
Try the Manowar drinking game sometime. Listen to their whole discography in order and take a shot every time the words “fire” or “steel” appear in a song. You will be unable to drive halfway through “Battle Hymns”, unable to walk or speak by “Fighting The World” and by the time “Triumph of Steel” comes around, there is a good chance you’ll be in a coma.
If you can’t see the sheer comedic genius in this, the last few pieces of evidence should seal the deal for you.
Exhibit A: “Metal Warriors“
Forget for a moment that they continuously encourage “wimps and posers to leave the hall”. Forget that within the first minute of the song the Disneyesque lyric “there’s magic in the metal, there’s magic in us all” appears.
They build the song to a dramatic verse which ends with the unfathomable words “got to make it louder, all men play on ten, if you’re not into metal, you are not my friend”. In case you missed it the first time, Adams howls the same verse at the top of his lungs only seconds later.
Exhibit B: “Spirit Horse of The Cherokee”
There have been many poignant tributes to the plight of Native Americans. This is not one of them. I’m not sure what kinship Manowar feel with Native Americans. They both have long hair. That’s all I can come up with.
Still, that doesn’t stop Eric Adams from punctuating the chorus with a ridiculous made-up Cherokee war cry without a hint of irony. Or from screaming “Let The White Man Die!!!”.
Are they aware that they are white? Probably not. This is Custer’s Last Stand and they are Sitting Bull and his army of Lakota Warriors. They have taken this bizarro fantasy so far that they are actually capable of believing it.
Exhibit C: “Guyana (Cult of The Damned)”
If you ever want to illustrate Manowar’s talent for ridiculousness to the uninitiated, this is the song to do it with. Long before they were rallying Native Americans to slaughter white men, they managed to write a song meant to highlight the horrors experienced in the 1970s during the mass suicide by Jim Jones’ People’s Temple in an event known as The Jonestown Massacre.
Only Manowar would have the temerity to begin a song about such a somber topic with the line “Thank you for the Kool-Aid, Reverend Jim”. And only Manowar could finish this seven minute catastophe with the haunting words “MOTHER! MOTHER!”
Exhibit D:
Although this article is clearly meant to mock Manowar, it is also meant to be a genuine tribute. They pull this nonsense off seamlessly and with a sense of timing that some of the greatest comics could never match. Few have ever scaled to such imaginary heights. Few have ever soared like eagles to this proverbial “rainbow in the sky”
There is only one Manowar. They are a gift from The Gods of Heavy Metal to remind us of the feats men can achieve when completely detached from reality.
Blue Oyster Cult Members Beat Heckler Into A Coma With Cowbell
Posted by Keith Spillett in General Weirdness on June 9, 2014
It all started innocently enough with a Saturday Night Live sketch featuring Christopher Walken back in 2000. Since then, the Blue Oyster Cult have been besieged by swarms of people all shouting the same thing “More Cowbell”. At first, the band enjoyed all the attention. “We thought it was hysterical,” said Cult front man Eric Bloom, “we were huge Walken fans and loved the whole cowbell thing.”
As time has worn on, the sheer repetition of the same joke has taken its toll. Bloom cannot go anywhere without hearing the same joke over and over. “I go to the supermarket and am in the frozen food aisle. Some fool runs by me and yells “More Cowbell”. I go to the 10 items or less checkout line…some idiot behind the register yells “Here’s your change….More Cowbell!!!”
“It happens everywhere. I’m at my proctologist the other day and the guy keeps shouting “More Cowbell” during my exam. At funerals, people come up to me as I’m leaning over the casket and shout ‘More Cowbell’.
“We are basically this generation’s Fonzi, with everyone coming up with their thumbs up shouting ‘Ayyyyyyy!’. It’s no wonder Henry Winkler got up on that bell tower and shot all those people.”
“Do you know how many bad Christopher Walken impersonations I’ve heard in the last month? 500 or 600, easily,” said Buck Dharma, the band’s lead guitarist. “We loved the attention at first, but people just won’t stop. The other day, somebody spray-painted “More Cowbell” on our family’s Labrador retriever!”
“Everybody wants to be part of the same joke. Everybody wants to prove they get the same stupid cultural reference. Everybody wants to be laughed at. Everybody should be covered head to toe in boils and left in the sun to rot.”
At a concert on Tuesday night in Akron, Ohio, things got out of control. The audience began screaming “More Cowbell” at the opening act “Yah Mo B There”, a local Michael McDonald cover band. Before Blue Oyster Cult came onstage the crowd chanted “More Cowbell” for nearly an hour. During every single song, the audience howled “More Cowbell” accompanied by raucous laughter.
Bloom was progressively becoming more annoyed. “We are doing ‘Harvester of Eyes’, they kept shouting it. We are doing “Career of Evil”…same thing. “Burnin’ For You”….again and again. Endlessly. We pleaded for them to stop, but they kept going.”
One fan, Zelmo Beaty, shouted the same line in a Christopher Walken voice for the duration of the show nonstop. The band had heard enough. They decided to take action.
They leaped from the stage taking drummer Jules Radino’s cowbell, held Beaty and took turns beating him over the head for five minutes the instrument, Dharma was heard shouting “How funny is it now?!!! You want anymore cowbell?!!!!” as security wrestled the bloodied cowbell from his hand.
Beaty emerged from his coma on several occasions rambling about how funny he thinks Jimmy Fallon is, how much he loved the Hunger Games series and how he thought Miley Cyrus’ public display of twerking was inappropriate.
No charges have been filed against the band by local law enforcement.
According to Akron Sheriff Will Kane, “This sort of violence is not normally tolerated in our community, but in this case, we can really understand. In America, people say the same ten things over and over again. No creativity. No originality. Just the same stupid lines ad nauseum. What The Blue Oyster Cult did was wrong, but can you really blame them?”
The Time I Met Chuck Schuldiner
Posted by Keith Spillett in People Who Were Willing To Speak To Me on June 8, 2014
Back in June of 1995, I was lucky enough to have met and spoken with Chuck Schuldiner. Myself and several friends were at a Death concert at The Roxy in Long Island and through a bizarre series of events we ended up on their tour bus.
Meeting Death was, for me, the equivalent of what I imagine Christians might feel having been in the presence of Christ. Seriously. For me, Death albums were transcendental experiences that explained most of the mysteries of the universe. Chuck was a mystic to me, Gautama with a guitar, The Great One sent down the mountain to help us see the invisible boundaries that we have created to lock away the most creative, life-affirming aspects of our being.
I’m sure I made a total fool of myself. I was your average 13-year-old girl getting backstage to meet Justin Beiber. I was stumbling around for words. Saying anything that came to mind to try to prolong the time we were in the man’s presence.
It was actually an uncomfortable feeling in retrospect. I didn’t want to mess up my one shot at actually asking the man the questions that had plagued me for the entirety of my being. This man had answers. No one could create like he did and not hold the key within him.
Finally, I worked up to asking him the meaning of the song “Vacant Planets” off of the album “Human”. I had somehow worked up a theory in my mind that this song was a comment on the nature of reality and life itself. I had pondered this song for hours and hours. Understanding its meaning consumed me.
There was something to the urgency of this song. It demanded to be understood. There was something deeper to it. Beyond meaning. Beyond rational thought. If he could just explain it to me, I’d have found the missing piece that explained this demented jigsaw puzzle I was living in.
I ambushed him out of nowhere with a rambling, semi-incoherent question about the song. “Chuck…I need to know about the song Vacant Planets. I mean, that song…that song. There is something within that song, you know. The planets around us are so empty. But, ‘in a realm so vast, we sit among the Vacant Planets’. They are vacant and without life. So is our planet, you know.”
“There is nothing to us. We are empty vessels. We eat, we sleep, we decay, we die. Over and over. And it all amounts to nothing. We want endless life, but for no reason. We don’t want to discover the universe around us, we simply want to not die. There is so much possibility wasted. This place is a void. No different than the emptiness on Mars or Mercury. We are a Vacant Planet! There is no meaning to any of it.”
During this whole disjointed explanation he regarded me with a great deal of kindness. He had a very empathetic expression. He was listening. He understood.
“Chuck, I need to know, am I right? Is this it? Is this what Vacant Planets means?”
He looked composed his thoughts for a second and looked away. I felt embarrassed. Had I said too much? Had I wasted my moment?
Then, he looked back at me. Stared directly into my eyes with a half smile on his face.
“Man…the song is about outer space.”
If there ever was a testimony to his genius, it was that answer.
George R.R. Martin To Write Lyrics To Next Necrophagist Album; New Record Expected By 3079
Posted by Keith Spillett in General Weirdness on June 5, 2014
Game of Thrones writer George R.R. Martin and progressive death metal rock and roll band Necrophagist will be teaming up on what some are calling a “dream collaboration”. An album, featuring Martin’s lyrics and the music of Necrophagist, is in the first stages of being created. This news delighted the many fans of Martin’s books (as well as the hit HBO series based on his work) along with metal fans who have waited for years to a follow-up to 2004’s Epitaph.
The album, which the band plans to name sometime by the year 2074, is expected to be a reflection of the many progressive influences they have picked up in the 70 years between their last album and the naming of the new one. Martin, for his part, is expected to have completed the first verse for the opening track by 2098.
While many fans are excited about the project, concern about the band and writer being able to hold up under the rigorous demands of the aging process have made others leery of ever seeing the project’s completion. After all, both the band and Martin will be over 1000 years old by the time the record comes out.
Luckily, science has again saved the human race from the perils of inconvenience. After years of tests on mice in a secret military lab in the foothills of Montana, a process known as partial nano-cryogination is ready for use on humans. Martin and the members of Necrophagist will be the first test subjects. They will be shrunk to three feet tall and stored in a device that resembles a mini-refrigerator.
Their body temperature will remain stable at around 56 degrees Fahrenheit. They will be brought out of their frozen coma one hour per day to work on the project. While the process will slowdown the bodies aging process to nearly a crawl, it will also limit the speed of motion of the human subjects. This is why the band could not commit to the record label’s demand of a new record by 2700.
Martin has yet to hint at the lyrical content of the album, but many industry insiders believe all the members of the band will be killed off by Martin well before the albums completion.
Still, hopes are riding high that the great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandchildren of these two talented artists will live to see this record digitally implanted into the minds of the surviving members of the human community by their robot overlords well before the year 4000.
I Tried To Book Tipper Gore To Speak At A Heavy Metal Music Festival
Posted by Keith Spillett in General Weirdness on June 4, 2014
Every once in a while boredom strikes and I get a weird idea to liven up my day. Yesterday, I was sitting around watching Maiden, England for the 60,000th time and it occurred to me…Why don’t I try to book Tipper Gore to speak at a heavy metal festival???
It seemed like getting in touch with her would be a difficult task, but a quick internet search brought me to the Henry Welker Booking Agency. Apparently, this agency handles everyone from Dick Cheney to Shaquille O’Neal. They also are the contact people for one Mary Elizabeth “Tipper” Gore, the woman who single-handedly tried to destroy heavy metal in the 1980s.
After being shuffled from person-to-person and listening to 10 minutes of unbearable hold music (“Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head”….Twice), I finally got ahold of this smarmy ghoul named Howard Robinson (who told me I could call him “Howie”)
Me: The promotional company I work for is putting together a special event and we’d like to book Tipper Gore to speak at it.
Howie: Sure. Sure. Well, I need to tell you that the former first lady (there was a pause where I was expected to chuckle at this)…I mean, of course, Ms. Gore usually books her speaking engagements about 3 months ahead.
Me: Perfect. I’m looking to book her towards the end of December.
Howie: And, just so you’re aware, we handle top-flight talent. Ms. Gore gets a minimum of $25,000 per speech along with travel and other expenses. Depending on what you are looking for the cost might run as high as $150,000.
Me: No problem at all. I have a sponsor who is quite willing to put the money up for a good cause like this.
Howie: Great! Well, let’s get started. What sort of an event are you looking to book Ms. Gore for?
Me: Alright. You are going to think this is kind of strange because of her anti-heavy metal stance back in the 1980s, but I’m looking to book her at a metal festival in Clearwater, Florida. The festival is called Values Fest 2014.
Now, I know what you’re thinking, but this isn’t your garden-variety festival. It’s one that will feature positive heavy metal bands who are using music as a platform to educate our young people about important issues like homelessness and global warming.
Howie: Uhm.. Okay…You have to understand, this is a pretty unusual request. I really have to run this by Tipper. What would you need her to do?
Me: Well, she would be speaking before a few of the headlining bands. Kind of like an emcee. She’d basically be talking about how music should be about promoting good things and not the awful, evil stuff that is out there now. I mean, things have gotten far worse since the 1980s as I’m sure you can imagine.
Howie: Sure…sure. You say you have a sponsor for this. I need to tell Ms. Gore who the sponsor is to make sure that her values are similar to the person paying the tab.
Me: He doesn’t really want me to use his name.
Howie: It’s pretty critical to the process.
Me: Okay, but this can’t go past you, myself and Tipper.
Howie: Absolutely!
Me: Donald Trump contacted me about a week ago. Apparently one of his grandkids is into a Satan worship cult thanks to listening to heavy metal and he wants to help the wipe the nation clean of the stuff. He’s putting up serious money for this but, does not, repeat, does not want his name linked to the project.
Howie: Well, she’s not a huge fan of Mr. Trump, but they are on the same page here. Because of the nature of this project we’d need about $200,000 to do this.
Me: Fine. No problem. Honestly, Trump is pretty into this idea. You could pretty much name your price.
Howie: Okay! I also need to communicate with her the names and a little bit about the bands she’d be introducing.
Me: Okay, well, it is a three-day festival. On Friday night, she’d be introducing a band called As I Lay Dying. The band name sounds pretty crazy, but I can assure you they are Christian and talk a lot about family. The name is actually a reference to a William Faulker novel about overcoming the pain of loss. They are also very interested in renewable energy.
Howie: Okay. I’m not sure she’ll go for that, but I certainly can ask.
Me: Stryper will also be playing that night. They were so inspired by Ms. Gore in the 1980s they started playing value-friendly metal, as we like to call it.
Howie: I’m sure she knows them and would be glad to do that.
Me: On Saturday, she’d be introducing a band known as Exodus. They’re lyrics are based on The Book of Exodus and they talk about living a Christ-centered life as well as how to deal with mental health issues like depression and pica. Their big song is called Toxic Waltz. It’s about individuals standing up to large corporations that spray toxins into our air.
Also, she’d be introducing a band known as Testament. Again, very spiritual. They do a lot with history, particularly the plight of disenfranchised groups like Native Americans. I could send you this song called “Trail of Tears” that I’m sure would deeply move Ms. Gore.
Howie: Sounds reasonable. Go ahead and send me the song. Who would she be introducing on Sunday?
Me: I’ll prepare you up front, the next one is going to sound strange, but there is a band known as Rotting Christ…
Howie: Okay…wait..
Me: It’s not what you think. It’s meant to be ironic. They are talking about how people’s faith has rotted away over time and they no longer value the positive parts of the world we live in. They dedicated a whole album to denouncing the treatment of women in Afghanistan. Another of their records deals with the importance of recycling.
Howie: I really don’t know if she’ll go for that. I mean…that’s a little…well…I don’t know…
Me: Okay, let me see what I can do about that. There would be a band that plays traditional Irish music called Celtic Frost that day. Nothing controversial there. She’ll really enjoy them.
The headliner would be a band called Burzum. The name is Norwegian for “kindness”. Very positive band. Great message. Varg Vikernes, the fellow who writes all the music, is interested in promoting diversity and tolerance.
Howie: Well, this is a pretty intriguing proposal. Of course, I’ll have to get the specific dates, run it by her and get back to you.
Me: Great! I’m really thrilled. She’s always been a hero of mine. Thanks for your time, Howie. Have a blessed afternoon.
Howie: Take care.
Poll: 67 Percent of Americans Believe Judas Priest Does Not Exist
Posted by Keith Spillett in General Weirdness on June 3, 2014
Judas Priest in the 1970s
According to a recent poll conducted by the Gallup Organization, 67 percent of Americans doubt the existence of heavy metal rock and roll band Judas Priest. Another 12 percent think that the band was once real, but were replaced in 1987 by Judas Priest-like robots. Another 37 percent think that the government created Judas Priest in order to distract Americans from Obamacare. While the number of believers has shrunken dramatically over the past decade, 58 percent of Americans still believe that Priest is real.
Where did this wave of Judas Priest denial come from? In a survey conducted on October 15th, 2001, 87 percent of Americans strongly believed in the actuality of Judas Priest, while 15 percent of Americans doubted their existence. Much of the credit for “unbackmasking the Judas Priest conspiracy” goes to a movement known simply as The Priesters.
Headed by Able Verruckt, a former Baptist minister once convicted of poisoning salad bars with botulism to weed out “vegetarian sinners”, The Priester movement gained the trust of the American people by pointing out the “obvious differences in Priest members over the past 4 decades.”
Verruckt, who lives in a secluded Y2K bunker in the mountains of Colorado, noticed inconsistencies in the sound and look of Judas Priest when Painkiller was released in 1990. “If you listen to Rocka Rolla then Painkiller it is obvious. Different actors are being used to play the part of Judas Priest. You don’t just go from sounding like Budgie to sounding like Overkill.”
Judas Priest Today
“If you look at a picture of Judas Priest in the mid-1970s and today, they don’t even look alike. I have learned from several sources that Halford was, in the early days, played by CIA agent and Watergate co-conspirator E. Howard Hunt Over the years, there have been 5 different Halfords, 11 Glenn Tiptons, and 16 Ian Hills. The lamestream media doesn’t want you to know this, but it’s true.”
The question that many people have wondered is why Judas Priest was invented. “After Watergate, several high ranking government officials who were part of the Bilderburg Group realized that Americans had become to curious about the actions of their government.”
“So they created Judas Priest in order to occupy fans of heavier music with songs that carry secret messages. Remember that show trial where the lady said that Priest lyrics played backwards killed her son. That was a false flag operation to distract Americans from the coded messages that exist when you play the record FORWARDS.”
According to Verruckt, if you listen closely to any Judas Priest record closely enough you will hear subliminal messages like “trust FEMA” and “Oswald acted alone”. Metal isn’t the only genre where this brainwashing was used. Madonna, Michael Bolton, Dr. Dre, Huey Lewis and the News, and Zamfir, master of the pan flute, were all on the Bilberburg Group payroll.
This Seemed To Fit
Many Americans, frightened to the point of insanity by 9/11 and the election of America’s first Kenyan President, have been swayed by the Priesters argument and have begun burning copies of the band’s records. Mable Saugnapf, leader of an Iowa Priester Group known as Grizzly Moms Against Jugulation, was once a Priest fan. She even owned a copy of “Sad Wings of Destiny” back in her so-called “sin after sin days”.
“I used to think Judas Priest was real. When the crisis actor playing Rob Halford came out of the quote, unquote closet, I knew I was wrong. Forces within our government and France were trying to turn us all gay.”
“I realized that the government and the media have been lying to us so often, how can I trust anything they say? Vaccinations, fluoride in the water, chemtrails, HAARP, Dick Cheney planning 9/11, Judas Priest…all part of a bigger picture. When you put the pieces together, you start to see the truth. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world that Judas Priest exists.”
The Tyranny of Tradition 