Posts Tagged Barack Obama citizenship conspiracy theories

Media Slams Tyranny of Tradition For Linking Nebraska Mayoral Candidate Gord “Piley” Kirchin To ISIS

The Next Mayor of Nebraska???

Ole Piley…The Next Mayor of Nebraska???

A media firestorm is swirling surrounding Tyranny of Tradition writer Keith Spillett’s October 31st article on Exalted Piledriver Frontman and Nebraska Mayoral Candidate Gord “Piley” Kirchin. In the article, Spillett alleged that Kirchin “hinted that he would consider allowing ISIS to take control of parts of Lincoln, Nebraska and impose Sharia Law.”

Trusted news sources from Fox News’ anchor Megyn Kelly to Alex Jones have chided Spillett for irresponsibly stoking the American public’s fear of foreigners by reporting false information in an attempt to increase readership.

Spillett, who revealed this weekend that his source was a 7-year-old Trick or Treater dressed as an ISIS member, still stands by his article claiming that “whether the information is true or not, it was told to me by someone who might have had something to do with the situation, therefore, it is accurate.”

Tyranny of Tradition Writer Keith Spillett

Tyranny of Tradition Writer Keith Spillett

Kirchin’s campaign manager Elizabeth Borden read a statement on Sunday morning vehemently denying that he would turn Lincoln into a bastion of Islamic radicalism.

“The Metal Inquisition is in no way associated, nor does it condone anything ISIS does besides the beheadings, and even then, only with professionally calibrated and registered Robespierre Industries Drop N’ Chop 2000© guillotines, even then only to be used on posers, wannabe’s and corporate lobbyists.”

“While ISIS could possibly generate a decent noise-core record or two, Sharia Law is pretty damned stupid and should be viewed as low and offensive as Nickelback’s last three albums, any two ‘songs’ by Drake, or any single millisecond of Justin Bieber’s total recorded output, and is to be shunned, reviled, and vilified as such.”

Meanwhile, Kirchin’s campaign has been emboldened by the scandal. Many Nebraskan’s who were initially put off by “Ole Piley’s” threat to make the “streets of Nebraska run red with the blood of those who betray the sacred cause of heavy metal” have begun to see him as a sympathetic figure.

“We kinda thought he was a bit, well, mentally disturbed when he started running. With that headpiece with all the spikes and all. Come to find out Ole Piley is a nice fella. And he’s against Sharia Law, so he’s alright by me,” said Merv Cunningham, a farmer and voter from McCook.

A Nebraska Voter on His Way To The Polls

A Nebraska Voter on His Way To The Polls

A recent Gallup/CNN/Albert Speer Poll has Kirchin leading Nebraska Mayoral Incumbent Ben Roberts 61-57, with 7 percent of Nebraskans favoring former President Harry S. Truman. With the election on Tuesday and his numbers trending in the right direction, mayonnaise may end up being the new democracy.

, , , , , , , , , , ,

1 Comment

Trump Accuses Obama of Being First Overkill Drummer

Mr. Skates Goes To Washington?

In a continuing assault on the life and career of President Barack Obama, 2016 Presidential candidate Donald Trump accused Obama of being the drummer for the metal band Overkill on the albums “Feel The Fire” and “Taking Over“.

In an interview with syndicated conservative talk radio host Jonathan Winthrop, Trump said “If you look in the liner notes at the first two albums they have someone named Rat Skates listed as the drummer.  That can’t possibly be a real name.  I believe that Barack Obama was playing drums on both of those records.”

This is another in a series of accusations made by Republicans that Obama is, in fact, a “secret metalhead”. The accusations started two months ago when Glenn Beck revealed that Obama was in a thrash band in Chicago while he was working as a community organizer in the mid-1980s.  Beck claimed that Obama’s band “mostly did Coroner and Slayer covers, but a few originals.”

Other reports have claimed that the band, known as Barry O’Death and the October Revolution (BODOR), recorded a demo but nearly all of the copies have been destroyed.  Various media outlets have contacted three supposed members of the group but no one has agreed to go on record about having played in the band.

Trump claimed last month that one of his investigators had gotten their hands on a copy and he had heard the demo.  According to Trump the sound was “very raw but pretty unoriginal.  They seemed to be trying to copy Exodus ‘Bonded By Blood’ on most of the tracks.”

According to Trump, the demo had ten songs on it with titles ranging from “Destroyer of Worlds” to “When Death Rides A Horse” to “Free Healthcare for Everyone”. Obama has never directly addressed the metal rumors but in his biography Dreams from My Father he does discuss being “really impressed with the first Manowar album, particularly the epic feel of the song Battle Hymn”.

Rat Skates on Tour With Overkill in 1981

Rat Skates on Tour With Overkill in 1981

Trump supported his latest accusation by claiming that the drumming on “Feel The Fire” was extremely similar to the playing on the BODOR demo.  “I have heard a lot of drummers over the years and this person who is supposedly known as Rat Skates plays just like Obama.  There is no way you could hear the song Blood and Iron and think it was anyone but the future President playing.  The styles are too much alike.”

Trump has encouraged Obama to come out and be forthright with the American people about his metal past.  “It’s not right that the President is keeping the American people in the dark about an issue as important as his taste in music.  If the President listens to thrash, death or even proto-doom, it’s important that the people know so they can make informed decisions.”

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,


Op-Ed Response to the Sarah Palin Oystergate Scandal

If you want to find out what started this whole mess, here’s a link to the original article.

Get more coverage of  Sarah Palin and Oystergate on Facebook or Twitter

There have been many scathing editorials written throughout America on the Sarah Palin Oystergate Scandal.  This recent item was a column that appeared in this morning’s Fort Worth Examiner. Jonathan Winthrop, who is referred to in his bio as a “true, red blooded patriot”, writes a weekly column for the paper called “America:  Love It or Leave It or Don’t”.

Even Bloodier Libel

By Jonathan Winthrop

If there’s one thing Americans have had enough of its Sarah Palin bashing.  First, the liberal media machine said she was not “intellectual” enough to join their little club.  Next, they said her words were causing deranged loners to turn violent.  Now, they are saying that she hates Swedes.  By the end of the year, they’ll be accusing her of the Kennedy assassination, breaking into the Watergate Hotel and turning Jeffery Dahmer into a cannibal.  It is interesting that every time that Kenyan in the White House has his poll numbers drop or has to go to the sentencing of one of his former Chicago cronies, Sarah Palin says something that gets herself in trouble.  If one looks closely, it starts to become obvious that the Obama administration, along with the wealthy Hungarian-American George Soros, are behind this latest round of Sarah bashing.  Sound crazy?  Let’s look at the facts.

First of all, lets clear up the comments made by Palin.  We need to face the uncomfortable fact that much of what Palin said is true.  Unless they started having elections recently without me noticing, Sweden is a socialist country.  Tax rates for the average Swede are right around 99.3 percent.  According to several studies, the average Swede works two and a half hours a week.  Yet, for less than 12 hours of work a month, Swedes have full health care, a chauffeured limousine ride once a week to the local “free store” and are given up to four massages a month.  And who pays for all these perks? Why the taxpayer, of course!

From a young age, Swedes are taught not to work.  The most commonly used Civics Textbook in Swedish classrooms is a malignant piece of socialist propaganda called “Why Work…The Government Will Pay You Anyway”.  The crime rate among Swedish teens is appalling.  By the age of 15, 1 in 2 Swedes has committed a violent crime, stolen a car or missed more than 10 days of school in a year.  Most young Swedes wile away their time hanging out with friends or listening to violent so-called “heavy metal music” or surfing on the Internet in these things they like to call “chat rooms”.  Their government sponsored schools and socialist parents are getting them ready for a life of reading Lenin, taking government handouts and mugging senior citizens all while the US tax payer foots the bill.  In this context, Palin’s point makes a good deal of sense.  Do we want our young men and women forsaking their commitment to truth, justice and the American way and becoming like young Swedes? I, for one, do not.

Much of the rest of the story includes your usual cast of characters.  Wildly inaccurate MSNBC stories, articles written by deranged (George Soros sponsored) bloggers and money hungry former employees and their fictitious accounts of anti-Swedish tirades by the Palin family.  All the while, the Obama administration skillfully manipulates the media into anti-Sarah commentary and Swede-baiting.  It is not a coincidence that several of the states with large Swedish-American populations were toss-up states during the 2008 election.  Minnesota, Wisconsin and Indiana could all sway the 2012 election in favor of Obama.  The Obama administration, a ruthless organization of Chicago pols bent on forcing all working people to their knees at the altar of Godless Islamic Communism, is again playing puppet master, pulling the strings of the media in order to force good people to believe bad things.

Before we join in with the legions of torch carrying former 60’s love children eager to step on the throats of hard working Americans with their collective Birkenstocks, let’s remember the lessons of 9/11.  The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.  The price of eternal vigilance is abiding loyalty.  The price of abiding loyalty is everlasting devotion. Let us never forget the dream our forefathers struggled and died for.  Let us never forget the price some have paid and others may pay and still others haven’t paid.  We must defend freedom!  We must defend liberty!  We must defend Sarah!

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,


Buggin’ Out: The Paranoid Style in American Motel Rooms

Few films capture the spirit of modern American paranoia better than William Friedkin‘s 2006 film “Bug“.  It is a bleak, disturbing picture of two people consumed by sadness and connected through a shared feeling of conspiratorial persecution. Peter Evans (Michael Shannon) is a drifter who wanders into the life of Agnes White (Ashley Judd).  They quickly find themselves embroiled in one of the more unhealthy relationships in recent film history.  Agnes has barely survived a horrifically abusive marriage and the kidnapping of her young son.  Peter has just finished a stretch some sort of shadowy psychiatric hospital where, depending on who you believe, he was either a severely disturbed escaped patient or a survivor of a series of Operation MK-Ultra meets The Manchurian Candidate type experiments.  Together, they become the proverbial Bogey and Bacall of the Black Helicopter set.  It would be easy to dismiss their ideas as the demented imaginings of two troubled people, but the narrative they construct about the meaning of lives and their relationship to the world is a powerful statement about modern mass hysteria.

Peter gets the paranoia party started by insisting that a mysterious THEY have put bugs in his blood.  He is deeply committed to this idea, to the point of yanking some of his own teeth out in order to remove the egg sacs that are in his mouth.  Quickly, things spiral out of control.  They cover the walls of the room in tin foil, buy up half the bug zappers in Oklahoma and embark on a wild spree of shared psychosis and Dionysian self destruction that eventually annihilates them.  The logic that gets them to this point is nothing short of amazing.  They come to believe that everything that is happening to them is somehow connected to a greater plan.  Peter connects his own experience to sixty years of back room schemes created by a mysterious unnamed cabal bent on completely enslaving the entire human race.  In an amazing monologue, Peter manages to link the bugs he believes to be carrying to The People’s Temple in Jonestown, the Bilderberg Group and their secret meetings from 1954 until the present and even Timothy McVeigh (who was apparently the other lab rat who was given these bugs).  Agnes soon links her own experiences to his and comes to realize that her abusive ex-husband and missing child are also products of the exact same treachery.  It is the “everything happens for a reason” philosophy writ larger than life.  All of these random, non-intersecting parts mean something.  Each person’s life is a giant puzzle where all the pieces fit.  It’s just a matter of collecting them all together and putting them in the correct places and then it will all make sense.  This is the sort of thinking that Kurt Vonnegut lays bare in his book “The Sirens of Titan“.  In that book, the entire arc of human history has been measured and calibrated in order create a replacement part for an alien space ship which will one day have the important task of placing a “greeting” message on a far away planet.  We all have a purpose and that purpose happens to be completely absurd.

“Bug” takes this theme and runs wild with it.  The characters have created meaning for their lives out of a mess of half-baked theories. Peter and Agnes really believe that this crazy composite of events was created for them.  They see themselves as the protagonists of human history.  They don’t simply pick one story as their narrative; they pick every single one that they have ever heard.  The world really does revolve around them.

As I was watching this film I began to wonder if this was an accurate portrayal of the condition of the paranoia that exists in the minds of most Americans?  Since I have never been in the minds of most Americans, I am not really able to say for sure. However, things are getting pretty weird out here in the real world and I have to wonder whether some of this isn’t the product of the same ideas that drove Peter and Agnes into mental oblivion.  After all, there are a good number of people who will tell you that our President was born in Kenya, the National Security Council masterminded the 9/11 attacks, or the Federal Reserve killed John F. Kennedy.  I’m not really interested in debating the validity of the ideas, I personally don’t believe them, but if you do that is really fine with me.   I have a few pretty bizarre ideas about human history myself.  What I find interesting about these theories is that how they illustrate the Woodward and Bernstein fantasy that some people are living.  We are the investigators of some great cosmic puzzle whose pieces are scattered willy-nilly through a series of cultural and political markers.  We are Sherlock Holmes turning our collective magnifying glass on everything.  Media events are not things unto themselves; they are clues that connect us all to a larger picture.

Marshall McLuhan argued in his book “Understanding Media:  The Extensions of Man” that modern technology had “extended our central nervous system itself in a global embrace”.  In “Bug”, Peter and Agnes disappear as individuals and instead try to take on the narrative of the human race as their new identity.  McLuhan saw this loss of identity as a dangerous thing.  He ominously noted that “the loss of individual and personal meaning via the electronic media ensures a corresponding and reciprocal violence from those so deprived of their identities; for violence, whether spiritual or physical, is a quest for identity and the meaningful”  (Canadian Forum, 1976)  This quote is “Bug” in a nutshell.  Two beings entirely destroyed (first as individuals, next as physical beings) by the electric connection to the rest of the world.  If violence is a necessary and eventual component of this search for identity then maybe we do have a great deal to be paranoid of.

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,


In Defense of Stupidity

Luke Scott Casually Discussing John Doe Number 2 and the role of the Lizardpeople in creating the Federal Reserve (borrowed from

A popular expression that tends to get used when people make asinine comments to a member of the media is “What were you thinking?”  It is a common retort used to illustrate when someone has said something so utterly without merit that the reporter doesn’t feel the urge to mount a counter reply.  Recently, Luke Scott, a muscle-headed, mouth-breathing Baltimore Oriole baseball player, who clearly cut many a history class in order to spend an additional hour in his school’s Chik Fil-A sponsored batting cage, made some monumentally dumb off the cuff remark about Barack Obama not being an American citizen.  This sort of remark has faded a bit from its mid-2009 health care hysteria peak, but you still hear the occasional Manchurian candidate nonsense rearing its jingoistic head.  I don’t expect Luke Scott to say anything worth listening to.  What passes for discourse between athletes and reporters is the general ever flowing stream of “I’m going to go out there and do the best I can and, God willing, my teammates and I will get a win” type truisms that are taught to these folks in six hour cram session classes run by slime bucket agents who are looking to make their commodities more marketable to the slab of the American public that loves to hear the same thing over and over again.

I really could care less what Luke Scott has to say.  What annoyed me was the glib, dismissive way that Yahoo writer Steve Henson rejected his remark in his recent free agency winners and losers column.  Obviously Steve, we know what he was thinking.  He was very clear about that in his statement.  He was thinking that Obama was born in another country and, therefore, is an “illegitimate” President.  The question seems to not be geared to mock what he was thinking, but his inability to know that when a reporter is around it is your job as an athlete to spout nothing but inoffensive, meaningless, Hallmark card style platitudes.  Henson was really asking, “How could he not know that saying this would make him look ignorant?  Doesn’t he know that it is his station in life to carry on this endless tradition of banal player interviews that we so love and revere?  Why didn’t he just say something like “Obama will be fine if he gives this whole being born in the United States thing 110 percent”?

One of the unnamed right of passage exams that an athlete goes through on the way to householdnamedom  is the “Can you say absolutely nothing of substance every time you are within 50 feet of a microphone” test.  This is why listening to most athletes being interviewed is a highly painful endeavor.  It’s as if the interviewer and the player a conspiring to cover up any human characteristics the athlete could possibly have.  Occasionally, we are treated to colorful dimwits like Charles Barkley or Curt Schilling who say embarrassing “what the average guy is thinking” sorts of things, but mostly it’s just more of the “It was my childhood dream” sort of garbage.  The Barkley/Schilling type stuff is awful for other reasons, but at least when I listen to it I know that their is a human being in there instead of a piece of equipment that runs a 4.3 40.

There is an upside to athletes feeling they have the ability to express themselves with some degree of freedom.   For one, I now know that Luke Scott, once only known to me as the guy I might pick instead of Edwin Encarnacion in the 14th round of my AL keeper league draft, is a raving lunatic.  Luke Scott has gone from 27 homeruns and 72 RBIs to a real human with definable features.  I can like him or dislike him based on his ideas.  Maybe there are a few Bill “Spaceman” Lee, Dock Ellis or Jim Bouton types who really have something unique to say.  There is a real loss sports fans experience when athletes do not speak their minds.  It is the loss of the chance to meet these players as human beings with real ideas and emotions.  The ideas they have may be shameful, obnoxious, or ill informed but they remind us that we are living in a world of humans who feel, think and dream just like we do.

, , , , , , , , , , , ,


%d bloggers like this: